Since having a best friend completely change into someone else and leaving my life, I was starting to wonder if maybe there was something wrong with me. Am I annoying? Do I care too much? Am I too different from the norm for my own good? But when I met this person, they made me feel great and loved me for who I was. We had plans to do all of these things together, becoming best friends almost instantaneously.
Then a few days ago, something changed. It was like we were never friends. I would contact them, try to make plans, they would be made...and then, they never showed up. It happened a good 3 or 4 times in one week. That's when my head started spinning again, asking all these questions wondering if it was my fault. When I'm true to myself, I know it's not my fault whatsoever. But still, I can't help but wonder if I push people away. And I don't like that theory.
As of right now, we're not really speaking, which makes me really sad. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I might be blessed to have another best friend in my life. Someone I can call at any given time just to talk. To make spontaneous plans to Orlando to go enjoy the Wizarding World and Disney, something we both have a passion for. Someone who I know will always have my back.
I don't know if we'll be friends again. I sure hope so. But all I know is that something my mom has taught me since I was very little always stands true:
Better to have a handful of true good friends than to have a million that will never stand by you.
I'm pretty sure all of you already know this, but as a growing young woman, who learns something new everyday, I have to remind myself of things through life's lessons.
Hope everyone is well. Have a Magical day! :)
Kayla ºoº
Kayla,
ReplyDeleteOne thing you MUST get firmly put in your head is that there is nothing wrong with you. Even in adulthood I'm still learning that the people who are really your friends will remain, and it *is* better to have just a handful of those than a lot of others (just as your mom said). I've tried to be thankful for the circumstances that have made me aware of who my friends are. Remember that it is better to find out who is not your friend sooner rather than later.
In the meantime, I may not be able to do a spontaneous trip to Disney because I have three kids, but I can manage a scheduled one. I'm just a half hour away.
This really hit home for me because in a relatively short amount of time, I had a bunch of "friends" start randomly not liking me, all for different reasons and in different situations. I also started wondering if I was doing something wrong and why everyone I was becoming friends with was disappearing. But like you, I realize that it's not my fault, and that an unfortunately large amount of people are, well, just mean. And the friends that I do have, even if I don't see them for a while (since some of my friends go to college in different cities and stuff), are still awesome when I do see them. And it's the true friends that count!
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